For those who have asked...
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Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Job search
I will just say that it is very difficult, in this day and age, to find a legitimate job opportunity online. Maybe I'm showing my age, but I remember being able to access reputable online job databases that didn't include "work-at-home" or "investment" scams. Now, that's not to say that these scams weren't around way back when...I remember going to a very nice office building myself for an in-person "interview" that included a sales demonstration of a very impressive collection of kitchen knives (don't know if I ever confessed that one to anyone). But it seems the scammers have become more savvy with new technologies and have the ability to reach desperate job-seekers far and wide.
It's a shame, really. In the midst of the piles of crap, I found a couple really interesting (and legitimate) job opportunities that had escaped my notice. They're a bit old...but I think I'm going to apply anyway. Can't hurt to try. At least I know I won't be selling knives or making investments for a distant relative from Namibia.
It's a shame, really. In the midst of the piles of crap, I found a couple really interesting (and legitimate) job opportunities that had escaped my notice. They're a bit old...but I think I'm going to apply anyway. Can't hurt to try. At least I know I won't be selling knives or making investments for a distant relative from Namibia.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Animal lover?
I was talking to husband, who was sitting here.
When I noticed something weird here.
His name is "mousey," and he was apparently just sunning himself a bit under the lamp.
Sam is now crying and saying, "I'm going to miss mousey." That kid has such a kind heart.
update:
The charm of this little tale wore off when Mousey #2 took up residence in the same lamp.
I'm an animal lover as much as the next gal...but come on!
(No mice were harmed during the filming of this event. All mice were returned to the wild from whence they came...hopefully to never return to this particular sunny vacation spot.)
(And yes...I do see the humor in the fact that the first thing I did was grab my camera and take pictures.)
When I noticed something weird here.
His name is "mousey," and he was apparently just sunning himself a bit under the lamp.
Sam is now crying and saying, "I'm going to miss mousey." That kid has such a kind heart.
update:
The charm of this little tale wore off when Mousey #2 took up residence in the same lamp.
I'm an animal lover as much as the next gal...but come on!
(No mice were harmed during the filming of this event. All mice were returned to the wild from whence they came...hopefully to never return to this particular sunny vacation spot.)
(And yes...I do see the humor in the fact that the first thing I did was grab my camera and take pictures.)
Sunday, August 17, 2008
819.5
..."are we there yet?"
...miles driven this weekend.
...Starbucks we didn't stop at.
...pictures taken.
...pounds I weigh (looked at myself in those pictures...ack!).
...number of times I said, "Sam, no," or, "Sam, stop it," or, "Sam, behave."
...worries about the pets left at home with the petsitter.
...family members we haven't seen in years.
...number of times someone said, "Oh, the baby is just sooooo cute!"
...more dance moves our six-year-old knows than we do.
...french fries eaten in the name of collecting Star Wars Happy Meal toys.
...great memories created with Sam (Myles too, but he won't remember them).
...best wishes for the bride and groom.
...miles driven this weekend.
...Starbucks we didn't stop at.
...pictures taken.
...pounds I weigh (looked at myself in those pictures...ack!).
...number of times I said, "Sam, no," or, "Sam, stop it," or, "Sam, behave."
...worries about the pets left at home with the petsitter.
...family members we haven't seen in years.
...number of times someone said, "Oh, the baby is just sooooo cute!"
...more dance moves our six-year-old knows than we do.
...french fries eaten in the name of collecting Star Wars Happy Meal toys.
...great memories created with Sam (Myles too, but he won't remember them).
...best wishes for the bride and groom.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
14 years ago yesterday
Happy Anniversary to the slug who apparently totally forgot about our years of wedded bliss.
Guess you didn't figure out why I was in such a pissy mood last night, did ya?
(I know, I know...at least he's MY slug. Whatever.)
Guess you didn't figure out why I was in such a pissy mood last night, did ya?
(I know, I know...at least he's MY slug. Whatever.)
Thank you Secret Pal!
A lovely gift arrived in the mail yesterday from my secret pal in Tennessee (will I figure out your identity before the end of this thing?). GORGEOUS bamboo yarn from Southwest Trading Company in Sahara color. LOVE IT!
There was also this really cute little figurine of a mama turtle with a baby turtle on its back. Their heads and tails bob up and down on springs. I'd love to show it to you but Blogger is being extremely uncooperative in my effort to post a picture. You'll just have to take my word for it...it's adorable.
There was also this really cute little figurine of a mama turtle with a baby turtle on its back. Their heads and tails bob up and down on springs. I'd love to show it to you but Blogger is being extremely uncooperative in my effort to post a picture. You'll just have to take my word for it...it's adorable.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Email humor
It's not often I find something funny in my junk email box...but this made me giggle...
One of last week's emails contained a typographical error of one character, inadvertently creating an inappropriate message. Please know that it was a simple accident by one of our graphic artists, and that I sincerely apologize to any who noticed it.
Regards to all,
Patrick M. Byrne
CEO, Overstock.com
Don't you just wonder what it said?
One of last week's emails contained a typographical error of one character, inadvertently creating an inappropriate message. Please know that it was a simple accident by one of our graphic artists, and that I sincerely apologize to any who noticed it.
Regards to all,
Patrick M. Byrne
CEO, Overstock.com
Don't you just wonder what it said?
You never know
We were pregnant together back in 2005 when it all went so terribly wrong. I have been jealous of her ever since. More than once I looked at her and thought, "She's got no problems. She's young and beautiful and has a cute little boy. She has no worries."
Today we had lunch together.
She has PCOS and is currently on Clomid and hasn't been able to conceive baby #2.
You just never know.
Today we had lunch together.
She has PCOS and is currently on Clomid and hasn't been able to conceive baby #2.
You just never know.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
I want to ride some rides
"The fair isn't just about rides, you know."
So I decided it would be a good idea to introduce Sam to the agricultural way of life at the fair today. Now he wants a "bunny rabbit." ACK!
I guess there ARE worse things for a kid to get involved with than 4H. I'm just thanking my lucky stars that they aren't allowed to do rabbit projects until they are eight years old in our county. Maybe the novelty will wear off by the time he's eight. I just hope he doesn't decide pigs or cows are a good idea...
So I decided it would be a good idea to introduce Sam to the agricultural way of life at the fair today. Now he wants a "bunny rabbit." ACK!
I guess there ARE worse things for a kid to get involved with than 4H. I'm just thanking my lucky stars that they aren't allowed to do rabbit projects until they are eight years old in our county. Maybe the novelty will wear off by the time he's eight. I just hope he doesn't decide pigs or cows are a good idea...
Saturday, August 09, 2008
Friday, August 08, 2008
The world travelling doppler
I bought a doppler that arrived the day I returned from the hospital after Travis.
I lent it to a friend who had a beautiful baby boy.
It came back and I used it during my pregnancy with Myles.
I lent it to another friend who had a beautiful baby girl.
It has been returned.
I'm in the process of examining my own reaction to the darn thing (once I realized what was contained within the mailing box). So I guess the question is...Where does it go next? It seems a shame to stick it in the closet next to the Lovenox I'm storing for no known (sane) reason.
(I think I may start a new category for posts here...insane thinking...though that might be too depressing...as it seems I may then have to label EVERY post with that one)
I lent it to a friend who had a beautiful baby boy.
It came back and I used it during my pregnancy with Myles.
I lent it to another friend who had a beautiful baby girl.
It has been returned.
I'm in the process of examining my own reaction to the darn thing (once I realized what was contained within the mailing box). So I guess the question is...Where does it go next? It seems a shame to stick it in the closet next to the Lovenox I'm storing for no known (sane) reason.
(I think I may start a new category for posts here...insane thinking...though that might be too depressing...as it seems I may then have to label EVERY post with that one)
Family-Grief-God-Hope
If you get a chance (and you feel strong enough), you should watch this interview with Steven Curtis Chapman and his family on Larry King Live. They talk about the tragic accident that caused the death of their daughter/sister, Maria, back in May...the family's journey along the path of grief...and their faith.
Thursday, August 07, 2008
8 months and 2 weeks
"I can't believe I'm saying this because I can't believe it's true...but this boy doesn't have enough clothes."
Yes, we have finally reached that time where the insane baby clothes buying has dropped off and the baby is in NEED of new duds. Shopping because I HAVE TO...another milestone for Myles and mommy.
And please, let's not even consider the sad state of Samuel's wardrobe. Now I know how the traditional yearly "school shopping" pilgrimage came into existence...pure necessity.
Yes, we have finally reached that time where the insane baby clothes buying has dropped off and the baby is in NEED of new duds. Shopping because I HAVE TO...another milestone for Myles and mommy.
And please, let's not even consider the sad state of Samuel's wardrobe. Now I know how the traditional yearly "school shopping" pilgrimage came into existence...pure necessity.
Monday, August 04, 2008
Weird
My coworker has been pregnant and miscarried twice since September of 2007. Her doctor told her she has a giant fibroid that prevents embryos from implanting properly and she would need to see a fertility doctor. She has moral objections to reproductive assistance (I won't even comment) and was quite vocal about her reluctance to make the appointment. I'm not sure whether she ever did and/or if the fertility doctor helped her or not...but she is pregnant and due in February. She was so excited because at her most recent appointment they told her to "come back in four weeks" and she hasn't been told that in a very long time (her daughter is four years old). I'm excited for her. And yet I'm feeling weird about facing her progressing pregnancy on a daily basis. She's had a rough road and of all the women in my office I think she "gets it" the most. So what gives? More introspection to follow, I'm sure.
***edited to add***
As she was standing in the office today complaining about the smell of coffee making her sick, I realized...She's vocal and she's going to want to talk about it. The morning sickness...the maternity clothes...breastfeeding...
I want to run and hide.
Yesterday she asked me which was more adorable, "Your own baby or someone else's baby?" I was probably too brutally honest when I said, "I guess it depends on how much you WANT your own baby. No other baby seems as cute as Myles does."
I really need to learn to filter what comes out of my mouth.
***edited to add***
As she was standing in the office today complaining about the smell of coffee making her sick, I realized...She's vocal and she's going to want to talk about it. The morning sickness...the maternity clothes...breastfeeding...
I want to run and hide.
Yesterday she asked me which was more adorable, "Your own baby or someone else's baby?" I was probably too brutally honest when I said, "I guess it depends on how much you WANT your own baby. No other baby seems as cute as Myles does."
I really need to learn to filter what comes out of my mouth.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Miscellaneous thoughts, Sunday/Monday edition
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Been having a rough time keeping up with life and this blog. I think I'm going through my midlife crisis early. Yes, it's early...and I dare anyone to say any different.
A few nights ago my husband and I sat in our bedroom together for over an hour and talked. No television. Only the hum of the portable air conditioner and the occasional update from Sam on his Playstation2 progress. It was lovely. Except for the fact that we talked about how unhappy we both are.
It's mainly professional dissatisfaction for him, I think. It is that and so much more for me. He jokes that my "chi is off," but that ain't far from the truth. It starts with, "I'm not a very good lawyer," and ends with, "I'm a fat cow and need to get my fat ass moving." Slippery slope anyone? It's a fun ride...until you get to the bottom and land your ass in the pool of self-pity and loathing anyway.
Anyway...things are a bit stagnant and I'm feeling the need to shake them up. I've had a bit of a realization. When I achieve one dream I need to work for another or I become bored. I don't know if that's something peculiar to myself or if everyone feels that way. But I know that just being happy is...well...dull and unsatisfying. It's like, "OK, jumped that hurdle, now what?"
So I'm kicking around a bunch of ideas with Steve. The list seems to be focused on a change of career so far. I just don't think I'm well suited to being a lawyer. Too many stupid rules that make no sense and affect the lives of people who need help and protection. Sometimes I just want to stand in a courtroom and scream, "Are you f*cking kidding me?" I fear that one day I may just lose it and actually say something to that effect (which would definitely result in an involuntary career change). Better to get out now, I think, and save myself any potential embarrassment.
Problem is, I have so much debt (much of it law student loan debt...yes, I do see the irony) that I'm too chicken-sh!t to take much of a risk. And, of course, there is the consideration of another child. If I have any intention of trying another pregnancy, I want to do it now...while working in my current office. The non-monetary perks are amazing and I know I wouldn't get them anywhere else.
I guess we'll just have to wait and see where this leads me. It should be interesting...if only to me.
---------------------------------------------------
Speaking of another baby...funny story.
We went outlet mall shopping the other day and hit up a great sale at the Carter's outlet. I was there to shop for a friend, but I picked up a few things for Myles too. I mean, I couldn't resist the "Happy 1st Birthday to Me" onesie. He's going to be so stinkin' cute in it! But I digress...
It was dark by the time we headed for home. I thought Samuel had fallen asleep and Steve and I started talking (cute baby clothes will do it to you every time). I want another child...but I don't want to do the whole pregnancy thing again. Steve said he understood and I said he didn't understand jack. He said, "If you do get pregnant...all that fear..." And I said, "See, you're already to if I do get pregnant. I'm at, I don't want to be pregnant. The fear isn't even an issue...it's the injections in the stomach, the heartburn, the aches and pains, the hair falling out, the not being able to sleep. It sucked and I don't wanna do it."
Sam wasn't asleep. I know that because he informed us yesterday that he wants another baby so that he can take care of it..."but mommy doesn't want to it." I about snorted diet pepsi through my nose.
---------------------------------------------------
I have many thoughts about the phrase, "This isn't right." For so long that phrase was my constant companion. Now it seems like blasphemy to say it out loud. But it is still true. How can that be?
---------------------------------------------------
I fear I'm going to need to see a doctor soon for my gallbladder troubles. The wine and cheese party from the other night nearly did me in. Blech. I was hoping to avoid doctors for at least a year.
---------------------------------------------------
Speaking of the wine and cheese party...while it was fun, I am so glad to have that done and over with. It was only the second time we have had a real social gathering for anyone other than family at our house. The first was the first summer after we moved in. So it's been seven years.
Have I ever mentioned my extreme social anxiety issues? I'm sure you could tell they were lurking in my psyche just from my incessant blogging about other people and what I fear they are thinking of me. If I were a psychiatrist I'd probably venture a guess that it had something to do with being betrayed by two of my best friends during my formative years. Nothing earth-shattering, just the lies that schoolchildren tell each other.
I will never forget the day my friend, Marie, told me she couldn't walk uptown to the library with me because she had to go home. I had a window seat on the school bus that day and remember oh-so-clearly the image of Marie standing on the sidewalk in front of the library, laughing with her other friend, Amber. It was then that I realized I couldn't trust any of my friends...no matter how dear. And that has screwed me up for years.
Even now, at age 36, I wonder what the ladies said when they left my house Thursday evening. I fear what judgments were made behind closed doors. I feel sick when I think about why some women chose not to attend. Surely their absence says something about me.
See? Insanity. A friend recently mentioned it is better if you don't assign motivation to people's actions. But I can't seem to help myself.
---------------------------------------------------
I forgot to buy a newspaper last week and when I went through my coupon inventory I found a boatload of expired coupons. This money-saving thing...miss a week and it throws the whole thing off kilter.
---------------------------------------------------
Myles has been a real joy lately and I blame teething. The rational side of me can't be upset with him because I know it's gotta suck to be in pain and feeling crappy. But if he doesn't stop screaming at me 24/7, I'm going to lose my mind.
---------------------------------------------------
We had dinner at Eat N Park the other night. Another diner walked past us on the way to his table...carrying bagpipes.
All I could say was, "WHAT?!?!?!"
---------------------------------------------------
I have to get a wedding gift for my cousin that I don't know very well (I don't know any of my cousins very well). Cash or gift cards are always ok, right? Or should I just pick something off her registry?
I did cave on the dress and bought one. I KNOW! Don't be disappointed. I'm still going to make the dress I planned to make...but this takes the pressure off. A girl can never have too many pretty dresses, right?
---------------------------------------------------
There is this lady at work who makes awesome coffee in the morning. Then there is this other lady at work who makes awful coffee in the morning. The awesome coffee lady isn't in today. I can't just dump the bad coffee and make my own...can I? No. That would be rude. Right?
---------------------------------------------------
The county fair is getting all set up in anticipation of opening tomorrow morning with a 9am flag raising. Just driving by the fairgrounds makes me smile. The rides sit silently waiting for screams of thrills and excitement. The food booths are all closed up...promising treats that are as unhealthy as can be. The animal barns are being loaded with energetic horses and big lazy cows. Cotton candy and motorcross...draft horses and goats...spin till you puke and sewing exhibits. I can't wait.
---------------------------------------------------
Been having a rough time keeping up with life and this blog. I think I'm going through my midlife crisis early. Yes, it's early...and I dare anyone to say any different.
A few nights ago my husband and I sat in our bedroom together for over an hour and talked. No television. Only the hum of the portable air conditioner and the occasional update from Sam on his Playstation2 progress. It was lovely. Except for the fact that we talked about how unhappy we both are.
It's mainly professional dissatisfaction for him, I think. It is that and so much more for me. He jokes that my "chi is off," but that ain't far from the truth. It starts with, "I'm not a very good lawyer," and ends with, "I'm a fat cow and need to get my fat ass moving." Slippery slope anyone? It's a fun ride...until you get to the bottom and land your ass in the pool of self-pity and loathing anyway.
Anyway...things are a bit stagnant and I'm feeling the need to shake them up. I've had a bit of a realization. When I achieve one dream I need to work for another or I become bored. I don't know if that's something peculiar to myself or if everyone feels that way. But I know that just being happy is...well...dull and unsatisfying. It's like, "OK, jumped that hurdle, now what?"
So I'm kicking around a bunch of ideas with Steve. The list seems to be focused on a change of career so far. I just don't think I'm well suited to being a lawyer. Too many stupid rules that make no sense and affect the lives of people who need help and protection. Sometimes I just want to stand in a courtroom and scream, "Are you f*cking kidding me?" I fear that one day I may just lose it and actually say something to that effect (which would definitely result in an involuntary career change). Better to get out now, I think, and save myself any potential embarrassment.
Problem is, I have so much debt (much of it law student loan debt...yes, I do see the irony) that I'm too chicken-sh!t to take much of a risk. And, of course, there is the consideration of another child. If I have any intention of trying another pregnancy, I want to do it now...while working in my current office. The non-monetary perks are amazing and I know I wouldn't get them anywhere else.
I guess we'll just have to wait and see where this leads me. It should be interesting...if only to me.
---------------------------------------------------
Speaking of another baby...funny story.
We went outlet mall shopping the other day and hit up a great sale at the Carter's outlet. I was there to shop for a friend, but I picked up a few things for Myles too. I mean, I couldn't resist the "Happy 1st Birthday to Me" onesie. He's going to be so stinkin' cute in it! But I digress...
It was dark by the time we headed for home. I thought Samuel had fallen asleep and Steve and I started talking (cute baby clothes will do it to you every time). I want another child...but I don't want to do the whole pregnancy thing again. Steve said he understood and I said he didn't understand jack. He said, "If you do get pregnant...all that fear..." And I said, "See, you're already to if I do get pregnant. I'm at, I don't want to be pregnant. The fear isn't even an issue...it's the injections in the stomach, the heartburn, the aches and pains, the hair falling out, the not being able to sleep. It sucked and I don't wanna do it."
Sam wasn't asleep. I know that because he informed us yesterday that he wants another baby so that he can take care of it..."but mommy doesn't want to it." I about snorted diet pepsi through my nose.
---------------------------------------------------
I have many thoughts about the phrase, "This isn't right." For so long that phrase was my constant companion. Now it seems like blasphemy to say it out loud. But it is still true. How can that be?
---------------------------------------------------
I fear I'm going to need to see a doctor soon for my gallbladder troubles. The wine and cheese party from the other night nearly did me in. Blech. I was hoping to avoid doctors for at least a year.
---------------------------------------------------
Speaking of the wine and cheese party...while it was fun, I am so glad to have that done and over with. It was only the second time we have had a real social gathering for anyone other than family at our house. The first was the first summer after we moved in. So it's been seven years.
Have I ever mentioned my extreme social anxiety issues? I'm sure you could tell they were lurking in my psyche just from my incessant blogging about other people and what I fear they are thinking of me. If I were a psychiatrist I'd probably venture a guess that it had something to do with being betrayed by two of my best friends during my formative years. Nothing earth-shattering, just the lies that schoolchildren tell each other.
I will never forget the day my friend, Marie, told me she couldn't walk uptown to the library with me because she had to go home. I had a window seat on the school bus that day and remember oh-so-clearly the image of Marie standing on the sidewalk in front of the library, laughing with her other friend, Amber. It was then that I realized I couldn't trust any of my friends...no matter how dear. And that has screwed me up for years.
Even now, at age 36, I wonder what the ladies said when they left my house Thursday evening. I fear what judgments were made behind closed doors. I feel sick when I think about why some women chose not to attend. Surely their absence says something about me.
See? Insanity. A friend recently mentioned it is better if you don't assign motivation to people's actions. But I can't seem to help myself.
---------------------------------------------------
I forgot to buy a newspaper last week and when I went through my coupon inventory I found a boatload of expired coupons. This money-saving thing...miss a week and it throws the whole thing off kilter.
---------------------------------------------------
Myles has been a real joy lately and I blame teething. The rational side of me can't be upset with him because I know it's gotta suck to be in pain and feeling crappy. But if he doesn't stop screaming at me 24/7, I'm going to lose my mind.
---------------------------------------------------
We had dinner at Eat N Park the other night. Another diner walked past us on the way to his table...carrying bagpipes.
All I could say was, "WHAT?!?!?!"
---------------------------------------------------
I have to get a wedding gift for my cousin that I don't know very well (I don't know any of my cousins very well). Cash or gift cards are always ok, right? Or should I just pick something off her registry?
I did cave on the dress and bought one. I KNOW! Don't be disappointed. I'm still going to make the dress I planned to make...but this takes the pressure off. A girl can never have too many pretty dresses, right?
---------------------------------------------------
There is this lady at work who makes awesome coffee in the morning. Then there is this other lady at work who makes awful coffee in the morning. The awesome coffee lady isn't in today. I can't just dump the bad coffee and make my own...can I? No. That would be rude. Right?
---------------------------------------------------
The county fair is getting all set up in anticipation of opening tomorrow morning with a 9am flag raising. Just driving by the fairgrounds makes me smile. The rides sit silently waiting for screams of thrills and excitement. The food booths are all closed up...promising treats that are as unhealthy as can be. The animal barns are being loaded with energetic horses and big lazy cows. Cotton candy and motorcross...draft horses and goats...spin till you puke and sewing exhibits. I can't wait.
---------------------------------------------------
Friday, August 01, 2008
Whiskers on Wednesday (on Friday)
I missed Whiskers on Wednesday this week. But Shamus gave me a great shot this morning. Hey, even the furballs have to recover from a good party.
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