Thursday, September 06, 2007

Nope, I just don't like her

I tried to like the kindergarten teacher. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt. She's a kindergarten teacher after all...we're bound to have different personality types, her and I.

But today was the day I realized it's not just that our personality types don't mesh. It's that a genuinely do not like her (and where else can I say that openly but on my blog?).

See, after the fiasco that was Tuesday's pick up from school, I made sure to deliver my son to kindergarten this morning with a note...saying that I would be dropping him off and picking him up from school...he is not to ride the bus. When I arrived this afternoon for pickup, she smiled and overly sweet smile at me and said, "I've got him in there, don't worry." I don't THINK I looked worried...I THINK she was just being condescending. But I brushed it off.

I walked into the building while the teacher led several students out to their waiting buses. I stopped in the doorway and smiled at Samuel, whose little face lit up when he saw me. He would have walked right out the door to me, but the teacher's aide said something to him and his smile fell and he sat back down. Now, I vaguely remembered something about parents waiting in the gym for their children, so I walked the three steps from the kindergarten room door to the gym door. I was about to enter when I was almost run over by a large tattooed burly man pulling a giant speaker on a cart. There was apparently some sort of assembly today (which is a WHOLE other post) and he was breaking down the equipment.

As soon as the man passed with the equipment cart, I was faced with a STREAM of small children...none of whom minded shoving into my protruding belly as I attempted to enter the gym. I waited patiently outside the gym door with several men who I identified as fathers waiting for their older elementary children. We stood along the wall and waited for the stream to pass (me, holding my belly as best I could to protect myself...if you ever get caught between a second grader's head and your unborn child's head, you will understand the pain it can cause...I hope you never have that experience...OUCH!).

So here's the thing. The teacher leads several children, including my son, by the hand PAST ME in the hall, shoving her way past small children going the other direction, smiling a smile directly at me that I am sure was intended, in her kindergarten teacher manner, to shrink me down to size. She gets the children into the gym, turns Sam around, and practically marches him back out to the door where I am still waiting amidst a sea of little people. She smiles at me and says in what is quite possibly the most condescending tone I have ever heard, "In the future, if you wouldn't mind waiting in the GYM for pickup." I mumbled something about not getting run over by the equipment and the children, grabbed Sam's hand (my other hand still protectively shielding my belly), and we finally walked out of there.

Poor Sam was so confused. He could see me, he could smile at me, he could walk past me...he just wasn't allowed to actually leave with me until I was standing in my assigned spot in the gym. I hope nobody is offended if I say how absolutely nucking-futs this seems to me.

And to top it off, the MEN standing there in the hall weren't told to move. In fact, looking into the gym, I noticed that it was ONLY women...that the men were either in the hallway, standing outside the door, or waiting in their pickup trucks in the parking lot.

Now I know I'm going to have to adjust to the soccer mom rules. And that's ok. But I NEVER imagined I was going to have to adjust to THIS...this...I don't even know what to call this...

Nope...I just don't like her...and I doubt I ever will.


Bon said...


i'm so sorry...because it's bad enough to have one of those in your worklife or circle of acquaintances, but to have her be Sam's kindergarten teacher? that sucks.

patronizing petty little people are my peeve this week anyway, mind you. ;)

however, on the brightish don't HAVE to like her. it would just be nice if she were someone you could.

Beruriah said...

Well that's just weird. I commend you for not snapping back at her.

I would so speak to her about it. I have my own former kindergarten teacher voice available. But that might not be the best route if she's seriously as patronizing and petty as she's behaving.

Marcia said...

My evil mind is at work, here, and this is probably totally unethical...but I am grinning thinking about how you could just casually let her know that two can play this intimidation game by scribbling your next note to her on your letterhead from work! :)
I hope, for Sam's sake, that she at least knows her stuff as a K teacher! Who on earth would try so hard to alienate a parent the first week of school???

BethGo said...

My husband has a theory about teachers. Some of them, like me, do it because they really want to make a difference in people's lives. And some of them do it because they like the power. The power they hold over small children...think about it, they get to tell them when to go to the bathroom, when to get a drink of water, when to go to lunch, etc. AND power over parents. Where else but at your child's elementary school would another grown up get to treat you like an idiot and make you stand in the freakin' gym to get your kid when you could easily just pick them up at the door? What difference does it make?
Blech. That teacher has issues that have nothing to do with you. Just remember that.
And hold your head high.

Lori said...

Nope. I don't like her either. And I have never even laid eyes on her.

We switched schools when Big J was in 3rd grade, and T was entering Kindergarten, and it wasn't until we changed that I realized how rigid the former school had been. Very much a stand-in-this-spot-to-pick-up-your-child
sort of school. They were weird about volunteering too.

The new school is much looser, and has a much friendlier feel. It is tougher academically, but strong on community. No surprise, but I prefer the latter.

Here's wishing she lightens up as the year progresses, and that Sam actually manages to like her even if you don't.

niobe said...

Not only is the teacher awful, but the rule, and particularly its selective enforcement, seems ridiculous and unfair.

kate said...

Huh, is that a kindergarten or a military academy there?

I had similar issues with Alexander's first-grade teacher. I finally (upon consultation with another mother in the class) decided she was inexperienced & without confidence, and was overcompensating. It was a LONG LONG year, and the next year i moved him to private school.

If you can swing it before the baby comes, maybe you could volunteer in the classroom a little to keep an eye on what is going on there.

Kathy McC said...

That's crazy. Sounds like she is having a power trip...

MB said...

I hate that kind of crap. It's the right time to switch classes if you feel like getting into all that. What a beeotch.

Hedda said...

I really doesn't make sense to me that they would have the parents come into the school instead of being picked up at the the sidewalk. It seems like more work for the teachers.

I would try talking to the teacher. If that didn't help I would make myself well known to the administration. (Especially since no one bothered to make sure the kids didn't run into Myles.)

Shinny said...

She does seem to have to have all the control, doesn't she? Do you have to wait for him in the gym if you need to pick him up at noon because of a dentist or doctor appointment too? ;)

I don't know about you but in this whole pregnancy state, I am getting sick of other people's shit and I would be kicking some *ss or at least tattling. ;) This is your son and by golly if you get there and want to pick him up from his room, then that is your freaking right. I would explain to Sargent Major that you do not need to be banged into by a bunch of impolite brats belonging to other people and you need to take your son directly from his room.

Good luck. I am a bit riled up thanks to being treated like a freaking "girl" at the car dealership and dang nab it, I am going to sticking up for myself for once and offer up some *ssvice to my friends as well. ;) Love ya!

pipsylou said...

I will bet you Sam's lunch money that his kindergarten teacher doesn't have children. :)

pipsylou said...

I will bet you Sam's lunch money that his kindergarten teacher doesn't have children. :)

and I SOOOOOOOO agree with bethgo, about the power thing. I did it/will go back to it because I LOOVE seeing the smile on a kids' face when he didn't think he could read a word and now he can. But there are SO many teachers who want the power. That, to me, is more than moderately creepy.

Can you take an afternoon and sit in and watch her in the classroom? That will make her squirm but more importantly, be wonderful blog fodder. :)

AJW5403 said...

His teacher sounds like she is on a power trip. Why people like this even take jobs as teachers I have no clue. But she needs to be put in her place. Is there any way you can talk to the school and maybe have him moved to a new class.

Ruby said...

I would have been beyond upset and wasted no time in setting her straight about my child.

You have a LOT of patience.

Sounds like you need a protect-the-baby-in-the-tummy pad ;)