Don't give my husband a "look" when our son says, "Daddy, I'm sorry I don't have a baby brother or sister to play with."
It's none of your business and your judgment is as unwelcome as your pity.
Just let him get through the moment with dignity.
Just let him get through the explanation to our son without making him feel the tears forming in his eyes.
Just let him be.
He is a father to one living son and one dead one...trying to maintain that delicate balance between love and sadness.
You can't understand...so stop looking...this conversation isn't for you.
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Conversation between me and co-counsel who I haven't seen in months:
A: Don't you have a brand new baby at home? (said with that baby-happy smile)
Me: No
A: No? (obviously confused)
Me: Ummm...he died.
A: Oh...I'm sorry.
Me: Well thank you.
A: I'm so sorry.
Me: Well, I'm sorry there's no easy way to tell someone that news. (really uncomfortable laugh)
A: (running away as fast as humanly possible)
Me: (don't cry, don't cry, don't cry)
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3 comments:
It sucks having to tell people "the news". There is no right thing for anyone to say, and I'm sure even if there were it would still be an uncomfortable exchange. (((Big hug)))
Ugh. I hate telling people. I just had to recently on email.
Plus this week I had to explain my necklace to someone... (I have a necklace that is a miniature version of Kate's footprint..). I only know this woman through conference calls and one meeting before this week. She saw my necklace and said it was pretty and asked where I got it. I replied that the funeral home did the print and sent it to a company to make the necklace. That ended the conversation pretty quickly.
I have no idea if she knew I lost a baby or not. I hadn't met her in person until this summer after I had lost Kate.
Well, hell. I'm sure those events don't help the bad dreams and no energy thing. I'm sorry...
What a crappy deal.
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