Friday, February 01, 2008

Miscellaneous thoughts

Apparently I'm still a beginner at this stuff. My big revelation for the week?

If the baby sleeps better in a car seat...let him sleep in a car seat!

(no, not ALL the time...but when you've tried everything else and you're ready to rip your hair out...)
Why does it seem like a lot of women have NO trouble blogging about their bodily functions, but when it comes to feelings they are so quiet?
Samuel has outgrown his snowpants...just in time for bathing suit season in the stores.

Anyone familiar with the return policies of L.L.Bean?
After threatening to leave my son at home on Thursday morning because he was dragging his feet so badly, the school dropoff routine will be modified so that Steve will be responsible for the little demon. Of course, I'll have to go to work an hour earlier since I don't have an excuse for late arrival. Is it wrong that I'm happy about it?
For a while I was obsessively checking the JCPenney website for a drop in price on the dining room set I wanted. I stopped for a couple of weeks because life interrupted and missed it being designated a closeout. Now I can get my big dining room table and TWO chairs. What's the point? I suppose I could buy the table and try to find the chairs elsewhere. But that just sounds like extra work that I'm not in the mood to tackle. So the hunt continues for the "perfect" set...again.
Seriously...donate to the MOM Project. It means a lot to me and I want to be able to stop worrying.
Gymboree clothes are going to put me in the poorhouse. I can not control myself.
Steve: "Should I wear red tomorrow?"
Me: "Why?"
Steve: "In support of heart disease...against women..."
Me: "In SUPPORT of heart disease AGAINST women?"
Steve: "Yeah, we need to take more women out with heart disease."
(semi-hysterical laughter)
I had my first I-left-the-baby-somewhere-and-can't-get-to-him nightmares last night. There was sadness in those types of nightmares before. Now there is sheer terror in thinking I have left Myles somewhere alone and helpless.

I suppose it's normal to have these fears, but the amplification of these thoughts through deadbabymamabrain is quite horrific. In fact, I've spent a good part of the last few weeks mentally preparing myself for all the horrible things that COULD happen to Myles and/or me. And it's not like I dwell on them at all. But the thoughts pass through my mind whether I'm expecting them or not...if I accidentally fall down the stairs while carrying him...if I wake to check on him in the middle of the night and he isn't breathing...stuff like that.

It's weird because I don't think of bad things happening to Steve or Sam. I guess a part of me still thinks of them as immune and I don't need to steel myself for bad news related to them. But Myles and me are clearly, in my addled old mind, still subject to the forces of nature and random bad luck. Old habits die hard, I guess.
My first snow day!!! I KNEW this kindergarten thing would pay off!!!

It's really more of an ice and cold day...but still...a day to stay home and snuggle with my boys!!!

January is over and I have NOT met my crocheted snowflake goal of one per week. Maybe I'll catch up with those today.

I also have to finish a couple baby gifts I've been working on and get them all packaged up to go out in the mail (before the recipient babies outgrow them).

Snuggling with my boys and's going to be a good day!
If I'm at home...without access to my work files on my work computer...WHY do clients want to call me and ask me questions? Do they really think I have a photographic mind and can remember the minutiae of what we talked about for ten minutes last Thursday? Because if I do have a photographic mind and can remember the minutiae of what we talked about for ten minutes last Thursday, I'm not getting paid nearly enough.
Another reason to ignore Valentine's Day...

The history of Valentine's Day is obscure, and further clouded by various fanciful legends. The holiday's roots are in the ancient Roman festival of Lupercalia, a fertility celebration commemorated annually on February 15. Pope Gelasius I recast this pagan festival as a Christian feast day circa 496, declaring February 14 to be St. Valentine's Day...

It was not until the 14th century that this Christian feast day became definitively associated with love. According to UCLA medieval scholar Henry Ansgar Kelly, author of Chaucer and the Cult of Saint Valentine, it was Chaucer who first linked St. Valentine's Day with romance...



Monica said...

Ditto on the carseat thing. When I bring Andy home from g-ma's after work I leave him in his carseat while I pump my breasts and start dinner. At first I felt bad but the darn kiddo actually likes it.

Hedda said...

The bad things happening thoughts are normal. You might be able to alleviate the waking up and finding him not breathing by buying the monitor I have.

It absolutley rocks. If there is no movement for 20 seconds, and that includes breating, it sounds an alarm. I don't know how it works, but I think it rocks.