I'm not sleeping well because I'm having nightmares. I have no idea what has set them off, but they are horrible, awful, nightmares that wake me up and won't let me fall back asleep. I am, therefore, a royal bitch to live with right now. Of course, my husband has been too afraid of me to ask what's wrong (and I can't say as I blame him...I could very well peel the skin off his face with my fire-breath if he looks at me the wrong way). There must be something brewing in the morass of crap in my brain...I just can't seem to access it during my waking hours at the moment.
Anyway...even if I COULD find my words, I don't think I could write anything as eloquent as this entry at Mommy Needs Coffee.
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My mom insisted on living independently. She wanted to live in the two-story house she and my dad built in the 70s, despite the fact that da...
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Hi Everyone, this is Cathy's husband Stephen. I am proud to announce that Myles Fisher entered the world this afternoon at 3:51 PM He ...
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When I was 18 years old, I wasn't paying attention while driving and I crashed my parents' van into a cruck (car with a truck bed) t...
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"Unfortunately, honey, the baby is no longer alive.". -Ultrasound doctor
2 comments:
Kate, I just admitted to my husband that, if I hadn't turned my life over to God, I might very well not be here to tell about my very, very long time in despair. My despair was different than yours, but in God's eyes, despair is despair. Reality may have prevented me from doing something drastic to myself, but God literally saved my life. I pray every single day, sometimes two or three times a day, that He does the same for you. You know I love you.
Im not sure what kind of nightmares your having but when I first lost Zak I use to dream I was still pg. It would take me a few minutes when I woke to realise I wasn't.
Now I dream about dead babies.
I dream I have a baby at 24 weeks and that I have to take loads of photos because she will be dead in a hour or so.
Its funny what our minds do to us.
And it hurts that with everything thats happened our minds feel the need to kick us as well.
Hugs
xxx
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