~I get to drink caffeinated coffee.
~The bottle nipple wash rack fell out of the cupboard at me while I was putting other things away.
~eBay notified me that the auctions on my watched maternity and baby items have ended.
~I'm using his yarn for charity.
~I can fit into my regular underwear.
~I just planted tomato plants without first donning gardening gloves.
~I took the last pill to dry up my milk.
~The laundry still has dirty maternity shirts to wash.
~Tomatoes don't taste as good this week...and I don't think cheeseburgers will ever taste as good.
~There are two, as yet, unused Playtex nursers in the cupboard where I store my crockpot (purchased for Alex). So my crockpot remains on my kitchen counter because I just can't face them.
~I can't yet lift and carry heavy things.
~No matter how hard I try, I can't hide the blood glucose monitor well enough in the bathroom cupboard.
~Baby clothes lurk in the basement AND in "the baby's room" upstairs.
I'm thinking of tackling them all in one day...purging the house if you will. Last time, I foolishly held onto the dream. This time, there is no dream to hold onto...not anymore.
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4 comments:
(((((((hugs)))))))) Yes, the little things are just so painful...
I am glad they gave you the pills to dry up your milk, though.
it's been 4.5 years since my mother suddenly died. we still haven't cleaned out her belongings. i don't know that we ever will until my dad leaves the house that has always been their home.
there's no schedule, no right time and i don't think any real need to go through the belongings of those we love. they existed and our love for them and the relationship we shared with them still exists.
I totally agree about the little things....I spent so much time worried about what I was eating and drinking, it seems unfair to suddenly be allowed to go back to those things that were off limits. Deli turkey? Don't think I will ever be able to eat it again -- I feel like I am still going to harm my baby, which is so stupid, b/c this would have been the least of her problems probably.
The milk coming in was one of the worst things, I think. But at the same time I did not mind b/c it was a sign that I was a mother. Something to hold onto.....
I admire you, Catherine. You are so strong.
I agree - the little things are the things that often cause the most pain. And when little things add up to a list like this, they become very big indeed.
(((((HUGS))))
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