Hurt feelings

I am not a confrontational person in my real life. When my feelings are hurt, I usually hide out and avoid the person while I stew about it for a good long while. After some time has passed, I will casually/sarcastically say something to the other person. Usually, his results in a definite lack of satisfaction in the area of hoped-for apologies.

I know the adult thing would be to address the person directly as soon as possible following the "injury," but I'm too afraid that my hurt feelings will come out as angry words and permanently injure whatever relationship I'm dealing with (as I type this I'm realizing there is a very different standard for my husband and I'm not sure if it's a positive or negative indicator of the status of our relationship). I've never had a lot of friends at any given moment in time, so I hold tight to the friendships I have. But while I'm stewing about my hurt feelings, I wonder what it says about me and those friendships that I can't be honest in the moment...that I can't say, "hey, this hurt my feelings."