Thursday, March 01, 2007

Warning: ungrateful mother post ahead

Yes, I am an ungrateful mother. I want to sell all of our televisions (including the new huge one) and I want my son to shut up already! I actually just said, "If I hear the word TV one more time from your mouth, you are going to bed." OK...so TV isn't actually a WORD, but he's four-and-a-half and he doesn't know that (or I'll tell you to shut up too).

He gets home from preschool and the first words out of his mouth aren't, "Hi mom, I missed you today." There are no declarations of how much he loves me or how excited he is to be home.

No...his exact words are, "Can you turn on one of my shows?"

ugh!

And then, of course, comes the battle.

I say, "I'm watching something at the moment. As soon as it is over, you may watch one of your shows." I mean, it's Criminal Intent! I can't just give up on it halfway through! I need to know if the retired cop housing security officer really killed the city auditor and his whole family in their sleep!

Sam, unable to understand the necessity to see CI through to the end, replies with, "But maaaahhhmmeeee...I just want to watch ONE OF MY SHOWS!" (Good grief that kid can whine.)

And so it goes...back and forth...the volume increasing with each verbal volly...until I end up yelling, "I'M SAID I'M WATCHING MY SHOW NOW BE QUIET!" And he ends up crying and running out of the room. Nice. Great parenting.

EVERYTHING is like this. The food he eats. The clothes he wears. The entertainment he participates in. EVERY SINGLE THING is a battle of some sort. Screaming and crying and flailing arms and legs. He is driving me batty!

I THOUGHT I ended this particular battle with my all-powerful mommy power...no tv for the rest of tonight OR tomorrow night.

Until I hear him downstairs, whining to his father, "It's NOT FAIR."

Not one to give up a fight, I scream (yes...scream), "What's not fair?!?!" Followed shortly by the now infamous, "If I hear the word TV one more time from your mouth, you are going to bed."

So how much of a hypocrite does this make me? I can't stand the silence of my two other boys. But this son...this son could really afford to be a little quieter.

11 comments:

Julie said...

If it makes you a hypocrite, then I am right there with you. Personally, I think it makes us HUMAN, but that doesn't help the guilt of it all, does it? (((hugs)))

DD said...

I get "can I play with my game boy?" as soon as I pick him up. We've now banned the thing from the car so we can at least have a 15 minute 'normal' conversation on the way home.

Julie said...

Does this sort of thing work for husbands, too? Shhhhh... I'm watching golf/football/hunting/baseball/fishing/hockey/a historical documentary on the bubonic plague...
All I wanted to watch was "House". ::sniff::

Shinny said...

It will get better. 4 year olds think the world is going to end with every request of their's being denied. Alex did the same thing at that age. Give him a year and he will know how to operate one of the other TVs and then you will have to drag him away to even start a fight with you. And be warned, don't have a computer available when he is a teenager, then you will for sure not even know he is the same house.
And you are so not alone in saying things like that.

Athena said...

Welcome to the 'Terrible Toddler' stage... and you though it was just terrible twos :) My daughter was the same way. Strong-willed!! I read a book called The Strong-Willed Child by Dr. James Dobson, very helpful! Obviously every child is different, but there are key points in the book that worked great. I was doing the same thing, and I felt so bad for yelling. Things don't seem any better now that she almost 12, but at least I have the tools to cope... you're doing fine!!

kate said...

Yeah, i agree with shinny, this is one of those stages...the whiny-annoying stage LOL. It gets worse, and then it gets better. Then it gets worse again, when they are older. Alexander at nearly 15 -- he no longer whines, but has completely mastered the art of annoying all household members to the utmost extremes. Of course he is now very clever and will purposefully annoy us in extremely petty ways so that he can't *really* get in serious trouble for it. As i say, a true master of the art. I had to laugh this morning when he was driving Chloe into an abosolute fit just by moving his foot in her general direction...

You are doing just fine! Offer him some cheese with that whine...

pipsylou said...

i know those days are coming in our house...they're already here. "Elmo? Elmo? Elmo? Elmo? Elmo? Elmo?"

How are you, friend?

MB said...

OMG, I'm NORMAL! THANK YOU!

Aurelia said...

Hey, this is NOT hypocrisy. Reality is that all kids need discipline and rules to grow up healthy, and if you let him do everything he wanted just because you lost the other two boys, Sam would end up spoiled rotten.

And you could even end up raising an adult jerk...not exactly a great legacy. Keep it up mama, I'm backing you 100%.

Brenda said...

I think the sad thing is, that because you have lost your bubs you feel like you cant complain like every other mother does.

I felt like this when I was pg. Because we did IVF I felt (and others came right out and said so) that I had no right to complain about the crap that goes with being pg.
Every other pg women can say shes tired, in pain, has heat burn but because we wanted 'this' we should shut up and be happy to have all these things!!!

Its not fair that others make us feel like this (some might not mean to) and its even more unfair that we make ourselves feel like this.

You have every right to get pissed at your kids, tell them off, NOT give them everything they want and so on just like every other mother!

It doesn't make you a bad mother. It makes you human.

Hugs
xxx

Megan said...

Kate, the age 2 gets a bad rap. I think 4 is worse!! Both my girls have been monsters from the age 4-5. A few more months and hopefully things will improve!! It's not TV at our house that's the problem. It's the computer animals. If I hear I need to feed my webkins one more time, I'll be adding the kids computer to your TV pile!!