Two years

Happy Birthday to our baby.

*giggle*

After more than 50 years at Cleveland Metroparks Zoo, the 400-pound tortoise named Mary finally revealed that "she" is actually a "he."

Humor in the strangest places

Just read the BEST review of Sarah Palin's book, Going Rogue, on Amazon.com.

Ain't afraid of no Vietcong king, November 17, 2009
By Gen. JC Christian, patriot (Tremonton, UT United States)

There are many kinds of truth. There are truths based on facts, truths based on faith, and truths based on something that sounds as if it should be true (truthiness). Then there's the kind of truth we find in Sarah's book: stories and concepts that become truths simply because she states them. She's a lot like our Lord and Savior, Glen Beck, in that respect.

Sometimes, she states truths that would be considered ludicrous if uttered by someone else. Her claim that the McCain campaign forced her to spend $150,000 in RNC funds to dress her family in designer clothes is one example of that. Although it might be easier to believe that she acted like a trailer park Zsa Zsa who'd found a credit card left behind at a possum feed, she blames McCain staffers. That's good enough for us, because we have faith; we want to believe her truths.

But the book isn't perfect. As much as I enjoyed the few short paragraphs in which Mrs Palin laid out her policy objectives, she could have condensed it all into one sentence: "I'm going to grab an Oxo Good Grips Stainless Serving Spatula and go all mavericky on your non-white, non-Christian and non-heterosexual butts."

The book also fails to expose Mrs. Palin's intellectual brilliance and keen grasp of foreign policy issues. Why wasn't the text of her recent speech in Hong Kong included? Although it remains secret, it's rumored that she viciously rebuked the Vietcong king for his assault on the Empire State Building. That's a speech we've been waiting for nearly 75 years to hear. It's big news and should have been included.

As you read other reviews of this book, please remember that Mrs. Palin has many enemies who are eager to pan her work. The Palin family's most potent nemesis, Levi's johnston, is no dpubt fully erect and ready to spew globs of misfortune upon them for a third time. And reason-adoring intellectuals are certain to point out that an interview on Good Morning Topeka doesn't qualify as a policy summit in the Far East.

But a few bad reviews won't stop her. She's seen much worse from her kitchen window. It can't be pleasant to gaze upon Antichristograd every morning as you brew your coffee.

My review isn't complete, but I think I'll quit anyway, because writing reviews, like governing, is just too darned hard to finish.

Hi!

Tomorrow I'm going to meet some fellow blogging deadbabymamas.

I'm not exaggerating when I say that I owe my sanity to these ladies.

And while such a get together may have been sad and depressing just a couple short years ago...tonight it feels like it's just going to be fun...and good...and right...and oh-my-god-why-didn't-we-do-this-sooner?

I have a feeling I'm going to embarass myself.

What a difference a year makes

Tonight was parent-teacher conferences and I am happy to say that there were NO surprises. We have been fully informed of Sam's progress every week and we already know what his strengths and weaknesses are. THIS is what it should be like.

I mentioned our concerns about the vast amount of work they are doing in class and the teacher agreed that "we have a lot of expectations of second graders these days"...and SHE'S not entirely sure they are all age-appropriate. She said there's nothing to worry about at this stage if Sam's not getting it all done every day. She said that she understands Sam has a desire to be the class clown that interferes with his ability to perform...and she's working on it with him.

We survived two years of really BAD teachers and have reached the promised land!

Yay!

This would be funny...if...

So a client (and friend) walks into my office this afternoon and hands me a sheet with the login information for his caringbridge site.

(This would be the place for the punchline if this were a joke.)

"I thought you knew."

I didn't.

I have seen cancer ravage the healthiest of individuals...people I love. Some are still living with cancer...but they are not the same as before. Some...well...I can't even say it. Not now. Not with the same breath as I speak Nathan's name.

I told him that some day it will be funny...

Remember the way you told me you had cancer? hahaha

Some day it WILL be funny.

Right?

Money Money Money

I forgot to pay a couple bills.
One company wanted to charge me $14.95 to pay a credit card bill over the phone.
One company (that happens to be a client...how's that for irony?) threatened to turn off our water.
One company threatened to turn us over to collections...for $40.
One company DID turn us over to collections...for $60 (electric company bill I refuse to pay).
The eye doctor wanted money for my new glasses.
The prescription insurance company wants their $20 for Sam's medication.
I just got notice that our insurance is going to cost more but provide less coverage.
The bank has raised our mortgage payment...twice...in the last six months.
We still owe the petsitter for a weekend job they did for us two months ago.
I owe my office manager $5 for the boss's day gift she got.
I owe the lady down the hall $2.

It's really all about money, isn't it?

Everyone I know is in this very large boat that feels like it could sink straight to the bottom at any moment. The cell phone contract would cost us $$$ to terminate. The TV contract would cost us $$$ to terminate. We can't stop paying for the water or the electric or the cars or the house. The government wants their money for the education they so-expensively provided me.

Underneath it all...I'm unhappy in my job. I don't dig ditches or anything that's really HARD work. I work my brain...sorting out legal squabbles...solving problems. I keep telling myself that the intangible benefits make it worth while. But then I pay bills and think how stupid I'm being. This just isn't what I want.

I could design crochet patterns. I could sew. I could do a zillion things in this world. My girlfriend is a photographer. I would LOVE to be a photographer. A wedding photographer, actually. I studied videography in college and, though it's not exactly the same, it provides a base of knowledge. And now that I know how my fancy camera works, I could really do it.

But...then there's the money...

Where do you find inspiration when you're getting older and you have responsibilities? Where do you find the courage to just go for it? How do you chuck self-doubt and try to make your dreams a reality? Or is there a point in life when it's just too late to even try? Is there an age when you just have to settle for what you've got?