tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post2458518744254139038..comments2023-09-23T07:24:36.217-04:00Comments on Everything Is Under Control: My dirty little secretsUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-69442131738279158882007-09-11T19:52:00.000-04:002007-09-11T19:52:00.000-04:00Make perfect sense for you to feel this way really...Make perfect sense for you to feel this way really. Pregnancy doesn't necessarily mean happy happy joy joy for you now does it? So why the hell would you WANT to be pregnant. That button that you push to fast forward to the end is the only way in hell we would consider trying that whole pregnant thing again. So no, your not necessarily strong in the sense of how they might be thinking it. But hell woman, you get up every day, live your life and don't run in front of a bus. I'd call that pretty damn strong. <BR/><BR/>*hugs*cathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05499558026064730483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-66597521420193104332007-09-10T23:09:00.000-04:002007-09-10T23:09:00.000-04:00wow, what tricia said could've been me, except my ...wow, what tricia said could've been me, except my oops pregnancy was after three early miscarriages and my daughter's stillbirth at term. i went thru the same thing, being annoyed with people for saying how strong i was ... thinking it was meant to be and the baby was meant to live since she was an accident ... resenting the pregnancy because it felt like i was replacing my lost daughter ... terror that i'd lose this one, too. i suppose planned or unplanned, it's insanely difficult to go through another pregnancy after such devastating losses. i know i was insane until she was born screaming.karihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02554171617718378567noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-53754041585890877642007-09-10T09:09:00.000-04:002007-09-10T09:09:00.000-04:00My second pregnancy after loss was an "unplanned" ...My second pregnancy after loss was an "unplanned" one. As my fear of another loss and the stress of a pregnancy was significantly greater than my fear of not having another living child, I know there's no way I would have my daughter today if not for the "oops" factor. <BR/><BR/>I tried to live in this fantasy world that this was a sign and she was meant to stay with me. Some days this was enough and others well, it wasn't. <BR/><BR/>I understand about the guilt of being "fertile". For me, it was a way to transfer how I wanted people who "just happened to have their baby with no problems" to feel. So for the amazing women that have problems getting pregnant, I wanted to apologize to them for being pregnant. Somehow I now expected everything about pregnancy to be difficult and that should include getting pregnant. When it wasn't, well, it was just one more thing to feel guilty about. <BR/><BR/>Oh and you are brave...not for being pregnant but for sharing your emotions and thoughts, as this helps others to feel a little less alone!<BR/><BR/>Hang in there!Triciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07362574669374990320noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-85969070426704186452007-09-09T22:12:00.000-04:002007-09-09T22:12:00.000-04:00I don't think you've said anything too shocking......I don't think you've said anything too shocking... Maybe I just can't fathom doing anything other than putting one foot in front of the other and getting through one day at a time and so what you've written makes sense to me. Really all you are required to do is go through the motions right now... and you are doing that wonderfully.SWHhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06571144622886527378noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-14393075129439273862007-09-09T21:36:00.000-04:002007-09-09T21:36:00.000-04:00I wrote sort of about this before, about how thing...I wrote sort of about this before, about how things people do or would call me brave for are just things I don't have a choice about. <BR/><BR/>Whatever is helping you keep your sanity, though, I am all for it. And I hope you can bottle it and send some my way if/when I am ever in position to need it.Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09745262857388007041noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-24039137882805894462007-09-09T20:22:00.001-04:002007-09-09T20:22:00.001-04:00I don't know WHAT I would be feeling in your shoes...I don't know WHAT I would be feeling in your shoes, but I don't think you should beat yourself up about any ambiguous feelings you're having. Be proud of getting through it any which way you can. I really think you should be proud, accident or not.Roxannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08915721334800247580noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-21814418635856279632007-09-09T20:22:00.000-04:002007-09-09T20:22:00.000-04:00Thanks so much for your honesty. You know you mig...Thanks so much for your honesty. You know you might not think your brave because you didnt 'plan' this bub, but your brave to have gone through all you have and not be pg now and hiding under the bed!<BR/><BR/>Hugs<BR/>xxxBrendahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13142512974305818397noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-25113152814168369982007-09-09T19:37:00.000-04:002007-09-09T19:37:00.000-04:00i hope you won't take any offense, but i'm gigglin...i hope you won't take any offense, but i'm giggling a bit. because life - with all its twists and turns and the ultimate necessity of just keepin' on putting one foot in front of the other, for those who love us if not for ourselves - sometimes just makes me shake my head and smile.<BR/><BR/>thanks for being honest, Catherine. and don't delete the post. you've said nothing wrong, and nothing to jinx anything.Bonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14403701620708365171noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-27970439125172059062007-09-09T18:11:00.000-04:002007-09-09T18:11:00.000-04:00I don't categorize you as "strong" or "brave", tho...I don't categorize you as "strong" or "brave", though those words may have some application to you outside of the context of this pregnancy. How do I think of you? As "real". And as "doing it, despite daunting circumstances". And as "warm" and "loving" and "loved".<BR/><BR/>Definately loved. By all of us.delphihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07529670960180261467noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-78908422494894582042007-09-09T15:54:00.000-04:002007-09-09T15:54:00.000-04:00I find nothing wrong with your brutal honesty. No ...I find nothing wrong with your brutal honesty. No one but you understands how you feel or what you are going through. All of us that have lost children pretend that we get you because we have lost children, but we can't truly get it because we are not in your shoes.<BR/><BR/>You are doing the only thing you can do. Putting one foot infront of the other every day. <BR/><BR/>We are all pulling for you and Myles.Heddahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10092579992277542694noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-45488168035794420492007-09-09T14:52:00.000-04:002007-09-09T14:52:00.000-04:00I guess that I am one of those people that have to...I guess that I am one of those people that have told you (on several occasions, I think!) how brave I think you are. To be honest, I kind of assumed that Myles wasn't planned and to be even more honest, when you announced your pregnancy on SG, the first thing I thought was "Wow...and she's still standing?". Having just lost Peyton a few months prior, the only thing that I could think of was that you were stronger than I could ever be, because I probably would have been in front of that bus.<BR/>You know that I am rooting for you and Myles! (((((HUGS))))))Casshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13618137294936023581noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8836584.post-55282710141516129232007-09-09T13:23:00.000-04:002007-09-09T13:23:00.000-04:00Most babies do live. Some don't. What happened to ...Most babies do live. Some don't. What happened to Alex and Travis were unrelated incidents except that the both happened to you and your children. It's hard to think of them as "accidents of nature" when it happens once, let alone twice to YOU and YOUR children.<BR/><BR/>I don't think of you as brave or strong. I think you won't take that wrongly. I think of you facing the future because you have to and as you wrote, it's love that helps you do it. Sometimes the love you have for others is the only tenuous link keeping you here and it's also that which gives rise to the hope that lets you buy things for Myles and imagine him making it out like "most other babies".<BR/><BR/>Hang in there Catherine.Rosepetalhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11198906406934870970noreply@blogger.com